Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Keeping it Real.

On the Corvetteforum tonight, a member asked for opinions concerning new C6 Z06 parts. That is, should anyone be able to buy these parts, or should some sort of proof of ownership be required before obtaining them? The idea, of course, is that if some douche-bag slaps a Z06 emblem on their non-Z06 car, other “real” Z06 owners’ dicks might shrink 0.8-1.2 inches on sight at the atrocity they are witnessing.

Back when I had a Mustang GT, I once got into a minor fender bender which necessitated a fresh repaint and new GT badge for my car. But before that took place, the body shop owner called and asked me, “would you like me to put a Cobra badge on there instead? It’s the same price.” To which I replied, “No thanks. I have a GT, not a Cobra.”

I just don’t get it. Why would someone want to misrepresent something they own, particularly when other signs so clearly indicate that they are full of shit? Perhaps their intention is to “trick” the bottom 10% of society. Congratulations, member of the 11th percentile! You are slightly smarter than someone who is a total moron!

Sometimes I wonder how much of the jewelry celebrities wear is actually real, and how much of their superfluous things they actually pay for. I once heard that the MTV show “Cribs” was comprised mainly of rental houses, and that the whole thing was a façade. That’s probably an exaggeration of partial truth – but I can say that my favorite “Cribs,” by far, was Red Man. He lived in a shitty apartment, where his cousin was asleep on the floor the whole time, the TV was surrounded by nothing but heaping piles of porn, the fridge had beer and old fast food, and the “piece de resistance” was his “bank” – a cardboard box that had wads of crumpled-up cash. Now *that’s* keeping it real.


Yes, yes, I know. Ironically, Red Man was probably deceiving the audience just as much as anyone else, but in the opposite manner. At least he was original in that he didn’t think it was his mission in life to maximize his perceived wealth.


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